Menopause, Mileage, and a Middle Finger to the Madness: One menopausal Aussie woman’s Guide to Walking Across America at 50
Let’s just lay it all out there—this journey would be a hell of a lot easier if I weren’t currently at war with my own body. Walking across the country at 50 is already a logistical and physical circus. But throw in menopause? And suddenly, I’m not just battling blisters, tumbleweeds, and unpredictable weather—I’m navigating a full-scale hormonal insurgency on foot.
We (ladies) spent decades navigating the monthly active crime scene in our uterus. We had a rhythm. A system. We knew the battlefield. Then, out of nowhere, the hormones throw up their hands and go, “We quit. F* this.”
And just like that, we’re launched into a new war.
Menopause… The Body’s New and Unhinged Battle Strategy
New weapons have been deployed.
Advanced. Sophisticated. Relentlessly unpredictable.
🔥 Hot flashes – Not when I’m freezing in my tent at night, because that would be useful. No, they prefer to strike mid-walk, when I’m already drenched in sweat and hallucinating about a cold shower.
🧠 Brain fog and forgetfulness – A special treat when navigating new towns, trying to find water, or remembering why I walked into a store. The GPS? Irrelevant. The map? A suggestion. My brain? A dial-up modem from 1997.
💤 Insomnia – You’d think walking 20 miles a day would guarantee instant lights out. Nope. Instead, I lie in my tent at 2 AM, completely exhausted and somehow still unable to sleep. Why? Because my legs feel like they’re trying to run a marathon in my sleeping bag. Restless leg syndrome kicks in like some late-night party guest who wasn’t invited. Add a side of existential thoughts and joint pain for flavor.
💪 Weight gain… while walking across an entire goddamn country – My body has one job here: burn calories. Instead, it’s hoarding every last one like a dragon guarding treasure. I could be climbing the Rockies, and my hormones would still be whispering, “Let’s hold onto this for later dear.”
😡 Mood swings that make no sense – One minute, I’m marveling at the sunrise. The next, I’m ready to punch a tumbleweed because it dared roll in my direction.
And then, just when you think you’ve made it through the worst of it—when you’ve gone seven months without an incident, and hope is within reach—BAM. A period. Just one. Just enough to reset the clock and remind you that your body is still in charge.
Why Didn’t Anyone Warn Us?
Here’s the kicker: I’m not mad that menopause is hard. I’m mad that no one talks about how hard it is.
Oprah said it best in The Menopause Revolution—most of us were completely unprepared for this chapter. We weren’t educated, we weren’t empowered, and many of us were outright dismissed by our doctors. We were handed birth control, antidepressants, or just told to “tough it out.”
There are 34 symptoms of menopause. Thirty-four. And yet how many of us knew that going in?
Why is it that something half the population will experience is still treated like a secret shame?
We’ve got to do better. For ourselves and for each other.
Women—educate yourself. Ask questions. Talk to your doctors. And if they dismiss you, get a second opinion. Do your own research before accepting “it’s just menopause, get over it” as the final answer. Because it’s not just menopause. It’s your body. Your future. Your vitality. You deserve real answers and real options—not shame and silence.
Mental Fitness & Menopause: Let’s Change the Narrative
One of the most overlooked pieces of menopause is the mental health toll it takes.
We joke about mood swings, but what we’re really talking about is the sudden and often frightening shift in how we feel, think, react, and cope. The hormonal rollercoaster can bring on depression, anxiety, rage, hopelessness—and for many women, it comes out of nowhere. No explanation. No roadmap. Just chaos.
And what do we hear?
“You’re being dramatic.”
“Maybe it’s just stress.”
“Welcome to the club.”
Or the worst: “You’re just going crazy.”
Let me be clear: We are not going crazy.
We are going through a massive neurological, emotional, and physiological shift. Our hormones don’t just regulate our cycles—they affect our brains. Our energy. Our memory. Our self-worth.
That’s not “crazy.” That’s chemistry.
And mental fitness during menopause isn’t just about surviving it—it’s about learning to ride the waves without letting them drown us. It’s about building emotional resilience, finding the right support, getting therapy if needed, and refusing to stay silent. It’s about creating space to be honest and soft with ourselves when we feel like we’re falling apart—and strong enough to say, “This matters.”
Menopause and mental health are deeply connected. It’s time we treated it that way.
So, How the Hell Do I Keep Going?
Because right now, I feel like a war-torn warrior in an army of one, battling an enemy that changes tactics daily. The road is long. My body is unpredictable. And my hormones are drunk at the wheel, swerving between breakdowns and bizarre detours like a bad road trip movie.
And through it all, there’s been one steady presence beside me—Gertrude. My stubborn, loyal, slightly banged-up travel companion. She’s carried my gear, my snacks, my sanity. She’s endured my mood swings and meltdowns like a true companion. When everything inside me has felt out of control, Gertrude’s been my grounded madness keeper. Rain or shine, she just keeps rolling.
From 50 to 51—And Still Walking
I began this walk at 50—half a century old, raw and determined, carrying grief, dreams, and a fire that hadn’t burned this bright since my twenties.
And now, in just 24 days, I’ll turn 51. Somewhere on a highway in America, Hoka’s dusty, legs aching, heart wide open—I’ll celebrate not just a birthday, but a becoming.
This isn’t just a cross-country walk. It’s a rite of passage.
It’s not about surviving menopause.
It’s about reclaiming power inside it.
Here’s the Strategy:
Radical acceptance – My body is gonna do whatever the hell it wants. I can fight it—or I can laugh, breathe, and keep walking. But this time. Armed with knowledge and hope.
Emergency snacks – Because sometimes, the only thing between me and a meltdown is a chocolate protein shake.
Honest conversations – I don’t pretend this is easy. I talk about it. With friends, with strangers, with anyone who will listen. Because we don’t talk about this enough—and it’s time we do.
Kindness to myself – If I need to slow down, I slow down. If I need to scream into the wind, I scream. This isn’t just a physical journey. It’s a spiritual one. And it demands grace.
Mental fitness matters – I take care of my mind like I take care of my feet. I check in with myself. I rest when I need to. I remind myself that emotions are real—and they pass. I don’t go it alone.
So to my fellow warriors out there on this hormonal battlefield—you’re not crazy, you’re not weak, and you are most definitely not alone.
You are not done.
You are in transition.
And you are still a badass.
This is just a new battle.
And we will win.
One step, one mile, one godforsaken hot flash at a time.
#KeepMePosted
#WalkingAcrossAmerica
#MenopauseOnTheMove
#MentalFitnessMatters
#HotFlashesAndHighways
#OneStepAtATime
Oprah Winfrey Halle Berry Naomi Watts Maria Shriver Leanne Morgan